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Chuck Norris would be 70 today if time wasn't afraid of him [Hero]

Published: Wed, 10 Mar 2010 03:06:08 ESTLogin to discuss

And the next extreme sport is: Coupon clipping. Wait, what? [Unlikely]

Published: Wed, 10 Mar 2010 02:08:00 ESTLogin to discuss

Water consuption in Edmonton during the Gold Medal hockey game; the beer consumption chart would probably look the same, but upside down [Amusing]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 23:16:37 ESTLogin to discuss

Bigfoot spotted in Maine, solid brown everywhere else [Unlikely]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 22:47:19 ESTLogin to discuss

I'll bet you thought you wouldn't encounter a news story today about a wolverine making sweet, sweet love to a tree. Well sir, that's why you have Fark [Amusing]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 22:12:53 ESTLogin to discuss

Theme: Movie poster for movie that never existed, but should have [Photoshop]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 20:07:49 ESTLogin to discuss

From the 'Are you sure this is a good idea?' department: Water and Sewer to be merged. Bonus: gas company may handle merger [Asinine]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 19:50:38 ESTLogin to discuss

Iowa Senate passes bar nuisance law. Maybe now we've seen our last cocked-hat over the eyebrow popped-collar douche who orders Glenlivet with Diet Coke [Unlikely]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 19:30:38 ESTLogin to discuss

Achievement Unlocked : Throw back a grenade before it explodes. Bonus : 'I remember thinking that if I didn't pull this off, it was going to hurt' [Hero]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 19:02:41 ESTLogin to discuss

Windows kill up to 1 billion birds in North America each year. 'I see no immediate reason why these figures would be erroneous' [Unlikely]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 18:10:39 ESTLogin to discuss

Many Americans say they're too tired for sex. But really, they're just not into you [Interesting]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 17:46:07 ESTLogin to discuss

When asking someone to find a hitman to kill hubby, make sure that person isn't a former NYPD detective [Fail]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 17:21:56 ESTLogin to discuss

Protip: If the Chevy conversion van is rocking (at 3:30 AM in the mall parking lot, under a lightpole), the cops will bother knocking [Amusing]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 15:33:03 ESTLogin to discuss

The flu symptoms that make you miserable are all in your head [Interesting]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 15:28:05 ESTLogin to discuss

Proving yet again that suckers and their money are soon parted, people are paying a New Mexico spa over $100 to smear Japanese bird poop on their faces [Stupid]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 15:28:03 ESTLogin to discuss

Former employee: I'm a huge social networker and stuff so if you don't like pay me $200,000 I'll bring the company down through spam emails. Company: Oooooooo, we're scaaaaared [Asinine]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 15:26:59 ESTLogin to discuss

Well, NOW where am I supposed to take this Grade-3 Plutonium runoff? [Strange]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 15:22:48 ESTLogin to discuss

Calling Venezuelan dictator Hugo Chavez a dictator is a criminal offense worthy of jail time according to Constitutional scholar Sean Penn [Dumbass]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 15:10:43 ESTLogin to discuss

Actual headline: 'Police say fake veterinarian - apparently dressed as a man this time - arrested again'. With pics of what a cross-dressing fake veteranarian looks like [Weird]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 14:45:39 ESTLogin to discuss

Turkey is discovering nothing exposes shoddy sub-code construction and bribed housing inspectors quite like a magnitude 6 earthquake [Sad]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 14:05:51 ESTLogin to discuss

Lindsay Lohan wants $100M over E-Trade ad because 'the actress has the same single-name recognition as Oprah or Madonna.' [Stupid]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 13:43:42 ESTLogin to discuss

The CIA recommended the use of Ensure Plus for the liquid diet so that detainees wouldn't die from inhaling their own vomit during torture. Seriously [Sick]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 13:29:47 ESTLogin to discuss

Good idea: Asking helpful policewoman for directions. Bad idea: While driving a stolen car [Dumbass]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 13:09:41 ESTLogin to discuss

Half of Americans have less than 10K saved for retirement. Those who have more will no doubt be asked to share their pie [Scary]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 13:07:24 ESTLogin to discuss

NYC infrastructure is crumbling, and there are few funds for repairs, but one artist may have a solution: Legos [Cool]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 13:02:40 ESTLogin to discuss

Due to low sales, Walmart discounts Black Barbie; obviously some people have a problem with this [Stupid]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 12:53:49 ESTLogin to discuss

Never before seen episode of Star Trek TOS has Kirk dealing with a terrible alien threat [Amusing]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 12:44:11 ESTLogin to discuss

Two idiots in a fraternity at submitter's Alma Mater allegedly wrapped some kid in TP and set him on fire. What was the stupidest thing you ever did in college? Bonus: look at the smirk on their mugshots [Asinine]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 12:37:47 ESTLogin to discuss

Write that on the tombstone: Second person nationwide ever to die in static-sparked fire at a fuel pump [Unlikely]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 12:35:48 ESTLogin to discuss

Ars Technica asks readers to turn off ad-block on its website to help save the site. On that note, if Farkers out there don't mind turning off adblock for Fark we'd sure appreciate it too -Drew (link fixed) [PSA]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 12:31:22 ESTLogin to discuss

'Holy criminy, you just shot the map' [Amusing]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 12:09:44 ESTLogin to discuss

The Florida Senate race is getting hairy: Crist accuses Rubio of using a RNC credit card to get his back waxed [Florida]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 11:40:37 ESTLogin to discuss

Window cleaner commits suicide by stabbing himself in the groin repeatedly with a jumbo souvenir pencil. 'If you were choosing to take your own life, that's not the way you would do it.' [Weird]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 11:36:41 ESTLogin to discuss

Man Surrenders In Fatal Stabbing. Dude, that's when you should be fighting back the most [Dumbass]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 11:19:46 ESTLogin to discuss

Lil' Wayne gets a year in pris...MAKE HIM PUT THE SUNGLASSES BACK ON [Followup]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 11:15:58 ESTLogin to discuss

Photoshop this stack o' flapjacks [Photoshop]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 11:14:49 ESTLogin to discuss

Germany criticizes Greece for being babies who refuse to fix their financial problems, while Greece says they'd have more money if the Nazis hadn't stolen their gold and all their kebab vendors [Obvious]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 11:02:28 ESTLogin to discuss

Auctioneer sells souls to highest bidder, one 'Mr. Mephistopheles' [Weird]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 11:02:16 ESTLogin to discuss

'Milking water out of a cow made of wood with rubber teats is a favorite activity there' [Strange]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 10:59:39 ESTLogin to discuss

Brooke Shields says fame is 'like a drug.' She must be getting desperate for a fix, though, as she's suffering post-partum depression from her career [Obvious]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 10:52:38 ESTLogin to discuss

Senate preparing to donate another $66 billion to its slacker bailout fund. Get your Mountain Dew and Cheetos now before it's too late [Asinine]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 10:32:24 ESTLogin to discuss

'Gasoline prices want to decline' says expert, apparently trying to use the Jedi Mind Trick on them [Unlikely]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 10:11:27 ESTLogin to discuss

87 percent of USA Today readers believe dogs are smarter than we think they are [Obvious]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 09:45:37 ESTLogin to discuss

'Cable guy finds kids home alone': more proof that Hollywood is out of ideas or actual headline? [Florida]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 09:29:35 ESTLogin to discuss

Jon Stewart proves that the SEC is run by those three monkeys with their hands over their eyes, ears, and mouths [Sad]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 09:26:26 ESTLogin to discuss

What better place to allow an exemption to the smoking ban then at the indoor benefit boxing match for children without health insurance [Stupid]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 09:19:33 ESTLogin to discuss

News: triple shooting on Ohio State's campus. Fark: didn't involve a football player [NewsFlash]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 09:01:25 ESTLogin to discuss

Ugly, skankifed, dirty suburban wasteland slum objects to being called a 'hellhole' on SNL [Amusing]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 07:57:41 ESTLogin to discuss

Caption the Queen of the World and James Cameron at the Oscars [Caption]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 07:49:11 ESTLogin to discuss

Detroit mayor to unveil plan to bulldoze a quarter of the city. Why stop there? [Interesting]

Published: Tue, 09 Mar 2010 07:32:02 ESTLogin to discuss